things i would tell my teenage self

(youngin' me circa 2015)

So I have been binge watching some amazing YouTubers recently who have been inspiring me a lot, it's refreshing to watch people who are actually talking about something with actual substance and relevancy and it has inspired me to give it a go myself. Try something a lil different., like why not, you know?

And yes I know, I was a teenager literally a month ago but this is aimed more at my 15-17 year old self, when I was in high school, and maybe someone else will read this and it might even be a bit helpful to them.

So here are a few things I wish I could've told my teenage self:

You only have one body, treat it with respect. That little voice in your head telling you that you’re fat is lying. Food is not the enemy and what dress size you are is not reflective of you as a person. You are so much more important than your weight and as long as you’re healthy, your body is happy. As difficult and out of reach it may seem to be, you will eventually love your body and feel comfortable in it, I promise.

Mum is always right, don’t disregard her advice or opinions on things. Pretty much every time she will eventually be proven to be right about things, she was a teenager too and does know a thing or two (or a hundred). But also, you do sometimes need to make your own mistakes, just be selective about them.

Cliques are dumb and pointless. Be friends with whoever you want to be friends with. If other people have a problem with that, that’s their problem not yours. Exclusivity restricts you being able to branch out and meet new people which is so important. It also kind of impedes you being able to grow and change as a person and figure yourself out, which has now not necessarily become an issue later on in life, but it has made itself quite apparent.

Don’t judge people. Everyone has their own shit going on, so you can’t possibly know enough about them to even make a judgement about them. Negativity breeds negativity, it’s a waste of energy and completely pointless. It’s also more reflective on you as a person rather than them.

Life will get better and you will be ok. The teenage years are really really hard, you have no idea what you’re doing, you’re trying to figure yourself out and learn new things socially and educationally. You’re having new experiences every single day and learning about people all the while your hormones are going absolutely insane and making you endure the massive highs and brutal lows of your mood swings. To make things even harder, everyone else is going through the same thing so that causes even more personality clashes and dramas which so does not help with your own shit. If things are getting a bit too hard, talk to a therapist, or your mum!

Be careful who you trust. That’s not to say don’t trust anybody but just be selective when telling people your feelings or secrets etc. some people might have their own motives and won’t respect your feelings, so just be certain about a person before you do spill your guts.

Stand up for yourself. Don’t let people judge or bully or make you feel shit about yourself. Don’t tolerate it, even if you consider them to be your friends, it’s not ok.

It is highly unlikely that your first relationship will be your one and only, so don’t allow yourself to put them above your friendships, it’s not worth it and you will end up quite lonely.

True friends are rare. Friendships are like relationships, you need to put just as much effort into them to maintain them and build that strong connection with someone. That being said, you don’t have to force yourself to be friends with someone just because all of your other friends are friends with them.

Study is important, but not having all excellence marks is not the end of the world. In 5 years’ time it’s not going to matter at all what grade you got in that biology exam. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself when it comes to college study, it so is not that important, it’s a tiny spec in your life. There are more important things in life than good grades.

If you do need some help, here are some links (for NZ): https://thelowdown.co.nz/ https://www.youthline.co.nz/ https://www.mentalhealth.org.nz/

http://www.lifeline.org.nz/

http://www.ed.org.nz/

Or you could talk to your parents, GP or guidance councellor

Courtney xx

#teenage #advice #mentalhealth #health #eatingdisorder #study #highschool #friendship #relationship #help #qa #bullying #selflove #selfhelp #selfcare